AVOIDANT INSECURE ATTACHMENT By Cecilia Gutiérrez A., Psychologist NSW SLASA.psychologist@nswslasa.com.au Last week we started to discuss the topic of insecure attachment, specifically the ambivalent and anxious type of attachment. This week we will consider avoidant-insecure attachment, what it consists of, its most common characteristics and how it influences childhood and personality development. We talk about avoidant-insecure attachment when the mother and/or father do not respond appropriately to their child’s basic and emotional needs and avoid him, maintaining an emotional distance from the child. The parents feel anxiety, rejection, and hostility towards their child likely due to emotional problems resulting from their own childhood attachment role models. This is all expressed through avoidant behaviours; a crying child, in discomfort due to an unsatisfied need, creates discomfort or tension and is difficult to handle. The parents will, therefore, try to handle the situation by denying their child’s needs and saying, for instance, that the child is not hungry, tired or in pain. A mother’s and/or father’s avoidance puts the emotional future and development of the child at great risk as varied experiences of rejection, poor quality of care, lack of affection and stability prevent the child from developing close, warm, empathic and trusting social relationships. It will be very difficult for the child to adequately handle and resolve difficulties when faced with problematic situations, as evidently, he has not developed an early sense of trust, and thus, self-confidence. |
